The Whole Nine Yards 2017 Season Review


Goal of the Season

Josimar to make it 3-1 v Muangthong Away

It’s difficult to separate the quality of the goal from the situation it was scored in, but luckily this goal combines scoring against Muangthong with a top quality strike. The ever venturing up front Nittipong put in a great ball, teeing Josimar up. Josimar struck it like an exocet missile, and was grinning as soon as the ball left is boot. Kawin seemed to be knocked over in the wake of the strike. Pick that out of the net. It was the third of three excellent goals against Maungthong in the first half, it’s all got too much. Has someone spiked my drink with LSD? Walking in a Josi wonderland.


Away trip of the Season – Chiang Rai Away


Not exactly a surprising choice from me. My first Chiang Rai away trip, a large away group including about 20 or so Thai Port Importz. Brian wrote a great lyrical match report, well worth another read.


Game of the Season – Suphanburi Home



Suarez putting in a great performance reminding everyone when he’s on his game he can really push the rest of the team along. Up 1-0, down 1-2 then back to 3-2. A comeback win showing 2017 Port have a bit of character. Here’s Tommie’s Match Report


Player of the Season

1st Rochela

2nd Pakorn

3rd Josimar

All three of these players played a crucial role in their own area of the pitch. I’ve ranked them 1st,2nd,3rd but these top three are pretty difficult to separate. Take any of them away and Port would be a different team this year.


Quotes of the Season

Tim on noticing Genki’s balls,

“Genki put in one of those balls-out left wing shifts that made us all love him.”

Everyone, “Why is it called ‘The Sandpit’?”

After some boisterous Port fans were let into the tunnel at half time, the Chiang Rai owner,

“I think you need to leave now.”

“Is this why they go away? For victories? For the sum total of sweet success surpassing the sum total of sour failure? Of course not. It just doesn’t add up. They go away because it distills down what they value into shouts, jokes, grins and grimaces. A chance for reality to manifest itself right in front of you. When this is why you go, you always win away.”

……. last paragraph of Brian’s Chiang Rai Match Report.

Me at Chonburi away. “What pond?”

After five different Port fans had predicted Buriram would win convincingly at PAT Stadium. Peter Hughes a visiting Buriram fan,

“I think you boys will get a point today.” Cue huge laughs at what would turn out to be a correct prediction.

Achim, after another thrashing by Bangkok United.

“There’s only one word for that, arbeitsverweigerung.” (‘refusal to work’)

…there you were cheering together, thumping one another on the shoulders, swopping judgments like lords of the earth, having pushed your way through a turnstile into another and altogether more splendid kind of life, hurtling with conflict and yet passionate and beautiful in its Art.”

…..J.B. Priestley, from “I’m Zone D Hardcore till I die”

Tommie, “He’s worse than my Grandma, and she’s dead.”

Pang, “Zico is here long term, we are building for 2018.”

Jim, “You know what we need, we need a real shit bag playing for us, an utter


“Certainly, on capacity-full nights, under the lights, the mist rolling in from the klongs, gazing across at the orange and blue sea of shirts massed in Zone C, a tingle ripples down my spine.”

…….. Hockers “A view from the Terraces Part 2”


“Shiiiiiit on the Muangthong…”


Muangthong fan in the Sportsman Pub, “I am sitting down.”

Dave Baraclough, “Well shut up then.”

Costa after the Samut Prakarn game. “I’m off to watch some football in Beirut next week.”

Keith’s review of my hi-so packed lunch.

“Weren’t you the one taking the piss out of me for having my Au Bon Pain sandwich at TOT Away? Today you’ve turned up with a croque monsieur and crème caramel for dessert!”

Keith, “I’m happy the drums aren’t here yet, it’s nice n’ quiet.”

Tom, “Combine the work-rate of Tana, the skill of Weera, the strength of Siwakorn, the positional discipline of Panpanpong and the sportsmanship of Suarez, and you have Sompong. He’s like the Frankenstein’s monster of shit footballers.”

Tim Walker, “That reminds me of the Archie Gemmill goal against Holland, that goal was so good I almost killed my dog.”

Me, “Amaretto anyone?”

Tim’s curse, “I began following Port F.C. in the summer of 2014, yet due to some curse put on me by a vengeful Burmese gypsy in Khlong Thoey market after I refused to buy her kumquats, as yesterday dawned I had still to see my team win an away league game.”


Giving something back

Great work from Spider Ming, great to see him rallying round and raising money from all of the Zones at PAT Stadium for one Port fan who had to have his foot amputated.

The fans and the club helping out with donations after the fire in Klong Toei. Good to see the website helping to raise money for a worthy cause.

Port it’s more than just a club.


Obscure Pun of the Season

“It’s a shame about Rayong”

Get that? …….No, I had to ask about it too. Andy Griffin was one of the 1% who got the reference.

“It’s a shame about Ray”, by The Lemonheads


Song of the Season

Winner “The Genki Nagsato Song”

You were working as a winger in Ratchaburi

When we met you

We picked you out, we signed you up,

We cheered you on

We turned you into something new


Gengki Naga

Genki Nagasato, Genki Nagasaaaaaaatoooo

Genki Nagasato, Genki Nagasaaaaaaaaaaatooo

Oh, Nagasato – you know I don’t believe you when you say you can play football

You’d better step it up or we will sign your sister,

Genki Nagasato, Genki Nagasaaaaaaatoooo

Genki Nagasato, Genki Nagasaaaaaaaaaaatooo

A close second the “A win away, A win away” song.

This song was not sung as much as I thought it would be, as Port actually had some great away wins this year.


Match Day Dinner of Year Award (vegetarian section)

Omelettes n’ rice at PAT, simple made to order, cheap as chips, no in fact cheaper than chips.


9 General High points

1) The debut year of

2) 1st win against Muangthong in since 2009.

3) Random friendly in Hua Hin.

4) Secret away game Muangthong v Brisbane Roar.

5) A serene moment of peace at Honda away. I got there early went to a nice little restaurant by the lake, very relaxing. It turned out to be the calm before the storm.

6) My first futsal match, a rain delayed indoor match.

7) Pakorn scoring from a corner twice, after Leandro had tried to do it every single time he took a corner for two years.

8) Siwakorn named top yellow card collector with 13 bookings in 2017.

9) Finishing 9th


9 General Low points

1) 50 year anniversary celebrations? There’s a key ring for sale in the club shop.

2) Port in yellow shirts, Pang’s subliminal political campaign, we know your game madam.

3) Still no beer on the terraces.

4) Losing so many leads.

5) Pondgate fiasco, there should have been a gate next to that pond.

6) Astrubal fiasco

7) Maranhao mid season transfer fiasco

8) Kalu off early fisaco

9) Zico fiasco

The main highlight of 2017 for me has been this website. Since I started following Port in 2011 we have always had some online presence. It started with Marco’s blogspot site, then me trying to update things via the Thai Port Importz Facebook page. Now we have moved into a new era with a swanky website, one that is better than Port’s official site, and to be fair it’s better than Welling United’s website which makes me both happier and sadder at the same time.

Big thanks to Tim and Tom for all their hard work on the website and thanks to everyone that has contributed to its success.

Dominick Cartwright

Dominick Cartwright

Originally from London, Dominick has been teaching English in Bangkok since 2006 and has been following Port FC since 2011.

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