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THE FAT CATWALK 2021: THE PUBLIC VOTE RESULT

When you open up a public vote on matters sartorial to a farang general public famed for its love of fashion disasters, such as elephant pattern parachute pants and Chang beer vests, you always fear the worst but it seems the Sandpit attracts a more stylish demographic than that found on lower Sukhumvit or at some Koh Pha Ngan beach bar. The results of the first FAT Catwalk public vote are in and thankfully it’s close enough to the correct list we gave you in our previous article, to not be offensive. So well done to most of you (there were a few horror votes – Chiang Rai United 5 stars pleeeeeeeeease) – you have our permission to continue dressing yourselves and thanks for voting. So, here’s the results and a little review of how they came about.

 

1.Suphanburi

Sandpit rank: 1st, average score: 3.44

What can we say, we feared the elegance of this number might be a little too subtle for many of you but you proved us wrong, so our winner also takes the public vote. A rock solid performance for the Warrix effort as it bagged the most five star ratings and was one of just two shirts nobody gave a zero. Well done to you all on your reading choices and fashion sense.

 

2.Bangkok Glass

Sandpit rank: 2nd, average score: 3.28

Just pipped at the post by us and the public the Bunnies put up solid numbers almost matching Suphanburi at every level, however, they just didn’t quite manage to bag as many five star ratings and picked up one zero mark and that ultimately proved the difference.

 

3.Buriram

Sandpit rank: 7th, average score: 3.19

The bronze medal is shared but we’ll place Burriam higher on the Thai-breaker (sorry I love that gag) of managing more five star ratings. We had our reservations about this simple looking from afar but heavily styled close up number but in one of the most noticeable movers from the list, it’s proven a winner with you. Let’s face it Thai football is better off with a decent Buriram shirt as you’ll be seeing the thing on every street corner.

 

3.Chonburi

Sandpit rank: 5th, average score: 3.19

Nobody scored more four star ratings than the Sharks and Nike combo. While only Prachuap in the top ten managed fewer five star marks. This one feels like everyone’s second favourite shirt. I thought the shiny shark tooth effect might offend a few but less than 10% gave it zero or one star.

 

5.Korat

Sandpit rank: 4th, average score: 3.06

Winning the always plentiful orange shirt mini league are Spanish manufacturer Kelme and Korat. Not much to say on the voting really, more than half of you gave this a four or three star rating.

 

6.Prachuap

Sandpit rank: 11th, average score: 3.03

We were somewhat underwhelmed by this effort and took further marks off for its similarity to last seasons offering. No such issues with the public who pushed the Grand Sport offering up the table. Managing just a solitary five vote, it scored heavily in the four and three area but not quite heavily enough to pip Korat for the best orange jersey.

 

7.Bangkok United

Sandpit rank: 15th, average score: 2.81

The biggest upwards mover, climbing 8 places. I guess it’s a free world and you’re allowed to make mistakes, and this really is one. Three clubs shared second on the five star vote count behind Suphanburi and this was one of them. Bizarre.

 

8.Port

Sandpit rank: 3rd, average score: 2.78

This put up solid numbers in higher rankings but was pulled down by scoring the second most zero rankings, so a big hello to all our rage readers and Muangthong fans. You know we’re better dressed than you deep down, don’t you?

 

9.Police

Sandpit rank: 12th, average score: 2.41

Along with Suphanburi the only shirt to avoid a single zero. We rated it an inoffensive if somewhat unimaginative number and the voting reflects that you share that view. It’s dull and I’m moving on. Next!

 

10.Khon Kaen United

Sandpit rank: 8th, average score: 2.38

Another one that managed to neither excite nor offend, collecting a lot of middling votes. While Police achieve mid-table producing a shirt few will remember five minutes after they see it, this one had plenty of detailing but aroused little interest, getting next to no votes in the top or bottom categories.

 

11.Sumat Prakan Dons

Sandpit rank: 10th, average score: 2.25

A nice change of direction but poorly and cheaply executed, you’d think that done with a bit more flair it could have pulled in some bigger votes. For all the talk of love for a sponsorless shirt, was this one held back by the acres of empty space? Another that did the majority of its scoring in the middle numbers with few of you loving or loathing it.

 

12.Ratchaburi

Sandpit rank: 13th, average score: 2.16

Nobody scored more two star ratings than Ratchaburi and it’s hard to come back from that. And this effort from Shoot didn’t.

 

13.Muangthong United

Sandpit Rank: 9th, average score: 1.81

We were nice to the team that used to win stuff from Nonthaburi, but you’re a ruthless bunch and we’re all for it. You gave the lads from Legoland and Shoot a sub 2 average score. Not quite enough to put them in the relegation zone but a solid rejection of all things scummy. One of just two shirts to fail to bag a single 5 star rating. Well done voters.

 

14.Chiang Mai United

Sandpit Rank: 14th, average score: 1.75

The other shirt not to manage a single 5 star rating. 75% of you gave this a one or two star mark and there’s no way back from that kind of performance, as The White Elephants in their pink elephant of a shirt find themselves filling the first style relegation spot. All of which makes the close season transfer, moving on from hip young thing Volt, and replacing them with the lumbering efforts of Grandsport, seems rather folly.

 

15.Nong Bua Pitchaya

Sandpit Rank: 6th, average score: 1.63

The biggest mover from our list sees the Gamecocks tumble an eye watering 9 places into the relegation places. We thought it would be a marmite offering. If that’s the case our readership is very much a vegemite crowd as it barely registered a five star vote and scored the most zeros. The message to Warrix and Nong Bua is clear: next year go back to those solid deep colours and simple designs of recent years.  *somebody is still moaning about the inability of the masses to buy into this pink hot mess. There has been editing*

 

16.Chiang Rai United

Sandpit rank: 16th, average score: 1.5

We had it bottom and thankfully the public agreed. Solidly awful was the view from the public with half of you giving this just one star. Although one style deviant managed to award the monstrosity 5 stars, we’ve passed their IP on to the relevant authority and wouldn’t be shocked if the rather well turned out boys from the fashion police pay them a visit in the next few days.

 

Thanks for taking the time to read and vote.

 

 

 

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The FAT Catwalk 2021: Every T1 Home Kit Rated & Slated

Sunday 6th September 1992 saw the launch of Channels 4’s Football Italia coverage, giving the UK the opportunity to see, what was then, the best league in the world (and still is for this footballing beatnik (besides Peru and A League obviously)). For two young North London minds it wasn’t just the football played by the world’s best talents that caught the eye. As the coming weeks saw them introduced to the styled elegance of Serie A mid 90s kits from Sampdoria, Fiorentina, Venezia et al, planting a seed that would blossom into a love of overpriced manmade fibers and the promotion of sportwashing and morally questionable multinationals. Eventually they met in Bangkok and began exchanging images of the best and worst obscure kits to be found around the globe. Now regarded as two of the foremost gurus on all things style and football shirts, they’ve never written for GQ, the Guardian or had their own show on BBC3 because that would be far too mainstream for these shirt hipsters. However, after much persuasion (they wanted to do T3 goalkeeper shirts), The Sandpit have pulled off quite the coup, as in their first available to the mass’s public exposure Jimny and Tobannah* have agreed to give T1’s home kits the once over.

(*I get it’s a hell of a stretch about a fat lad and a bloke who’s noted style moments include the words “pink sandals” but roll with me.)

So, without further delay here comes the unquestionably correct rankings, we’ll start at the top as is traditional (and some of the efforts at the bottom are truly horrific).

 

 

 

 

1.Suphanburi

This one absolutely grew on me. It looks so basic but in this league of teams shoehorning every idea they have or stealing from last season’s efforts from Europe’s big clubs, something clean, simple and original is a wonderful relief. Then it’s got the circuit board design in the material to make you feel like a terminator or transformer and who’s inner 5 year old isn’t loving that? Warrix lost their way a little in recent seasons, caught in the mid-ground between the younger, sharper, more risk taking designs of Ari and Volt, and the plodding efforts of Thailand’s traditional giants of shirt manufacturer Grand Sport and FBT, but this is a fine return to form for the national team’s supplier.

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.Bangkok Glass

It’s the simple things done well isn’t it. Royal blue with a vibrant yellow trim on the collar and sleeves, one main beer sponsor (not Chang) and then the remaining sponsors strategically positioned around the shirt in a considered way. It’s certainly not the most revolutionary of shirts but it is sure done well and looks the bees knees on players and fans alike.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3.Port

Rejoice for Port are finally free of Grand Sport. Ari step into the breach and start producing the most important shirt in Thai football. Great effort this, it takes heavy influence from the classic 2014 shirt. A season sandwiched between a promotion and relegation, Port would finish 13th in the Thai Premier League, do nothing in the cups, with Leandro top scorer amassing 10 goals. That’s the Port we love. As with their ACL shirt Ari’s only fault, oh so common in Thai shirts, is being a little too busy with the vague brush strokes effects, and is that meant to be stitching at the top where blue and orange meet? Thankfully they remembered less is often more with a splendid collar. Sponsor’s are spot on, the Leo perfect for pointing at when the vendors don’t want to believe you can communicate with them verbally and look at that lovely blue square – think how many moany old toads it will trigger, seriously make it bigger next year and get it on every shirt in the league.

 

 

 

 

4.Korat

 

The only all-orange effort in our top ten this season. The Swat Cats have selected Spanish brand Kelme to design their shirts, evoking formative footballing memories of Raul Gonzalez in the early years of his Real Madrid career. The shirt is well thought out; a simple, subtle orange tyre pattern with black trim and good positioning of several sponsors. Leo again and not Chang for the win. International car brands are always good for a sponsor but the logos at the bottom might not be 100% visible on fans with beer guts, doubt research and development looked into that.

 

 

 

 

 

5.Chonburi

Nike and Chonburi have been producing consistently decent efforts over recent seasons and there’s no change here. Keeping it very simple on the colour front of this shirt. The neck is great and it’s uncluttered by sponsors. The pattern evokes images of a well turned out pitch. It’s all very nice, if a little unspectacular. Then they go and stick this shiny thing on it that’s meant to be a shark’s tooth. Does it ruin a decent simple effort or save the shirt from being a bit boring? The debate rages on and we’ve both changed sides a few times.

 

 

 

 

 

 

6.Nong Bua

Certainly a ‘marmite’ shirt, I have some previous with pink items of clothing so I favour this shirt more than the co-author of this list. Thai sportswear companies are not afraid of reaching for the craziness and, as Nong Bua traditionally wear pink, Warrix selected a “thai dye”, could have picked this up at the night market feel for this season’s home effort. I think it works well, especially with the 3 sponsors positioned on the chest but not spoiling the effect like a big blue square plastered across the chest (cough, cough).

 

 

 

 

 

 

7.Buriram

On first impressions there’s a lot to like about what they’ve done here. It looks like just another simple dark blue Buriram shirt but up close you have all this paisley effort going on.  In theory great but there’s a little too much variety in that paisley, it becomes part paisley part stained glass pub window. To take it all in you’d need to spend about half an hour a couple of inches from the wearer. As ever, less would have been more, too much of a really nice and innovative idea leaves it all feeling like it’s trying too hard. I’m left with the sense it’s the kind of football shirt you’d see Richard Hammond wearing, far too much effort to vaguely look like no effort has gone into the corporate bohemian result. Then there’s the huge Chang logo, and nobody likes the devil’s piss.

 

 

 

 

 

 

8.Khon Kaen United

Newly promoted Khon Kaen are certainly not fucking about with their kit. The Kaen are our highest red shirt on the list and again it’s the little details that help the overall effort. The black trim to match the bold red (faded collar a nice touch too) and the snakeskin pattern across the body adds to the “we think we’re pretty tasty” vibe. Like Nong Bua, it’s clearly a kit made in Thailand and God bless the people at Ocel for designing it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9. Muangthong United

Nice enough in a simple way, the black colour works with the deep red and the sponsors are well done. The designers at Shoot have decided we’re far enough from the 2018-19 season to just shamelessly rip off that season’s Spurs shirt, using Man Utd’s colours and nobody will notice. You’re wrong buddy, shirt hipsters never forget! Besides try doing something truly interesting next time, might l suggest Newell Old Boys 1993? You’ll look like a black and red Port, have a vague link to Maradona and won’t even have to muster the effort of changing the main sponsor on paint or whatever you design on. Easy day at the office and a massive leap forward.

 

 

 

 

 

 

10.Samut Prakan Dons

The Dons are having a tough time financially it would seem and this has been clearly transmitted to their kits for this season. It’s a cheerful number made in-house but looks like a template effort. Blue and white hoops makes me think of the terraces of Loftus Road and the decent QPR team of the mid-90s. There’s only one sponsor – Chang, the mother-in-law’s favourite – and nowt else. It screams “we are brassic” but in a retro, “please don’t be mean to us” way.

 

 

 

 

11.Prachuap

Look, I’ve got no real issue with this kit, it’s just a bit too busy for my liking. Close to Korat with it’s choice of orange and black but then the sleeves go a bit mental and the monochrome sponsors just don’t work and are poorly positioned. It’s also very similar to last season’s kit and after suffering that as a Port fan with Grand Sport it’s no surprise they’re stiffing honest Prachuap supporters out of their hard earned cash.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

12.Police Tero

A bit budget. Looks like a cheap market job, only heightened by the classic market rip off two lines nod to Adidas. Something vaguely circuit boardie, finger printy or Polynesian going on in the material too but it doesn’t really impress. The beer choice of total wankers and a rather large CP logo between the manufacturer and club badge drag the shirt even further down this list. FBT had all their fun with the away kits and merchandise, this just seems an afterthought.

 

 

 

 

 

 

13.Ratchaburi

Ah it’s just shite really, the kind of shirt your nan would buy down the local market because she was too tight to get the original from Olympus Sport. The pattern on the shirt isn’t as good as some of the other orange shirts on this list and the darker trim is just an afterthought. Cheap and boring.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

14.Chiang Mai United

Did the design team stay up late watching the Euros the night before having to present, forget to do their homework and just copy what they’d seen? If they were watching Belgium, I suspect so. A lazy effort  made worse by the sponsors, another with one between badge and manufacturer’s logo and that Viet Air box is a rotter. Only one winner on the sartorial front in the second city this year as cross town rivals Chiang Mai are wearing some stunning Volt efforts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

15.Bangkok United

Ari have put Rangsit’s Bangkok United in numerous decent efforts over the years but suffer a massive fall from grace this time around.  What’s going on up top with the sponsor between the manufacturer and badge? The True logo is a bit high then you’re left with acres of nothing. Looks like something Disney would dress the baddie team in, where they to produce a “SOKKAH” reboot of the seminal “Mighty Ducks” franchise. Also the red seems to disappear when viewed on the pitch. The chevron design looks like something you’d expect on a pit girl’s catsuit. Still at least you’ll not see anyone walking the streets of Bangkok wearing it right?

 

 

 

 

 

16.Chiang Rai United

A c**ty shirt for a bunch of c**ts, Grand Sport unsurprisingly grace the bottom position with this nasty sportswear travesty. Lazy design and execution, a foul shade of orange, details which add nothing to the overall effort and blocky sponsorship logos (several of whom have cut out logos on their rivals) mean this shirt best belongs on a bonfire. Hate is a very strong emotion, but this shirt is really pushing its luck with me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Obviously, this is the unquestionably correct ranking of the shirts but in the interest of appearing democratic, we’re giving you the chance to offer your views on all the shirts and rate them for yourselves. Give each one a score out of five and next week we’ll compile the results into the people’s rankings, along with the views of a few of our writers.

 

You’re Shirt, and You Know You Are: Ten Years of Port FC Kits

 

With the 10s coming to a close, I thought it time to look back on Port’s sartorial record over the last decade and rank the home shirts in order of stylishness. There isn’t really a lot you can do with orange and blue stripes, but that hasn’t stopped various designers from trying to put their own unique stamp on the hallowed shirt, and has resulted in some very nice shirts, some unnecessary fannying about, and a couple of real atrocities. So, starting with the worst, here’s my rundown of ten years of Port shirts…

 

10: 2019

 

 

It may be the shirt in which Port won their first trophy of the decade, but other than that there is little to commend it. It clearly marks the point at which GrandSport, tired of working on new Port designs only for La Pang to slap that big, ugly MTI logo on them, simply threw their hands up, cracked open a few Leos, and handed over a shirt designed solely to accommodate the dreaded blue square. There’s very little actual orange on it, the shorts are massive, and as anyone who bought the shirt will confirm, it’s far too long. Hands down the worst Port shirt of all time.

9: 2012

 

 

Another shirt that looks like it was designed to give the sponsor some better exposure, this FBT horror from 2012 adds the stripes as an afterthought and has some silly blue bits on the sleeve to make it look as if they’ve put some effort in. What a mess.

8: 2011

 

 

 

There’s a fine line between classic and awful, and this effort falls just on the wrong side due to the designer deciding, presumably after a night on the Blend, to add some yellow stripes, collar and cuffs for no discernible reason. WHY?

7: 2018

 

 

Another poor effort from Grand Sport here. It’s half a classic – the right hand side of the shirt with the classic orange & blue stripes is very nice indeed and, had they made the whole shirt like this, it might have made the top three. But for some reason the left hand side throws in black and purple stripes and turns it into a real soi dog’s breakfast. I like the round collar, and it’s a very nice fit, but otherwise it has little to commend it.

6: 2015

 

 

Into mid-table now, and a just-about-acceptable effort from 2015, the season when Port had three different shirts. This was the first shirt of the Pang era, and stuck fairly closely to the classic stripes, but lost points by having more sponsor logos than an F1 car, and being very poor quality indeed – my wife’s shirt barely lasted 3 washes before all the badges faded out. But this was the shirt that clothed the mighty Gorka, so a special place in Port history.

5: 2016

 

 

A bit of a grower this one. I didn’t like the white sleeves at first but it’s actually become a bit of a classic and, due to the club massively overestimating how many shirts the club would sell in T2 and it not being released until two months into the season, it’s still on sale in the club shop today. Classic stripes, a nice collar, a snug fit, and the debut of the current lion badge make this a very nice shirt indeed.

4: 2013

 

 

Pretty much everything a Port shirt should be this – orange & blue stripes, simple round neck, and PAT in big letters on the front. A textbook example of why shirt designers shouldn’t fanny about too much.

3: 2014

 

 

Then again, sometimes a bit of fanny can be a good thing, as this lovely Mizuno shirt from 2014 proves. Maybe it has a special place in my heart as it’s the first Port shirt I ever bought, but I really like the way the left & right sides of the shirt mirror each other. Apart from the rather pointless white bit on the collar, it’s almost perfect.

2: 2017

 

 

A fine effort from GrandSport this. A stylish collar, nice dark sleeves, and some superb stripe work. Again, it’s let down by that bloody blue square, but otherwise it’s a very nice shirt indeed and if you have the version with the ’50th Anniversary’ badge on, worth at least 2000BHT these days.

1: 2010

 

 

Port’s first shirt of the decade would also turn out to be by far the best. The only time this decade Port worked with one of the big shirt manufacturers, it just does everything right – lovely stripes, just the one, tasteful sponsor logo, and the three stripes & Adidas badge. Truly a thing of beauty and the black away shirt was a belter too.

 

Don’t agree with my selection? Vote for your favourite shirt below and we’ll reveal the readers’ choice on Monday!

 

 

The FAT Catwalk 2019: Every T1 Kit Rated & Slated

 

2018’s FAT Catwalk, in which we ranked every Thai League T1 club’s kit, proved to be one of our most popular features ever, so we’re doing it again for 2019! I have to say this year’s crop is, with a couple of exceptions, a big improvement on 2018, with local kit makers such as Warrix, Ari and Grandsport upping their game and doing Thai football proud. It’s also great to see more & more clubs trying to blend sponsor logos into the design of their shirts, though the issue of too many garish sponsor logos remains, and it seems the concept of strict sponsorship restrictions is some way off. Anyway, here’s the long-awaited (delayed due to one particular club not releasing their shirt until the second week of the season…) 2019 Thailand T1 Football Shirt League Table!

Read more

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The FAT Catwalk: All 2018 T1 Kits Rated & Slated

 

It’s a little known fact that the Sandpit team are all hardcore fashionistas. Dom writes for Vogue Thailand, Tom is one of Bangkok’s most popular Youtube makeup vloggers, and I am a former Calvin Klein underwear model. Honest. So this week is Sandpit Fashion Week as I take a look at this season’s lineup of T1 kits and separate the Versace from the Primark, in descending order of quality…

 

1. Chiang Rai Utd

I’m not generally a fan of Puma shirts but Chiang Rai’s new strip is a very tasty little number. I was so taken with it when I first saw it at the Challenge Cup Final a few weeks back that I almost bought one. Simple, clean, not overburdened with sponsor logos, and no silly swirls or frippery. Looks very good on the pitch too, a consideration which shirt designers often overlook.

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. Bangkok Glass

Glass have a track record of envy-inducing kits and despite their fortune teller-induced rebranding, 2018 is no exception. I am slightly biased towards this one being a Coventry fan as it is sky blue, but it is damned sexy, and is only let down by particularly obnoxious sponsor logos which clash horribly with an otherwise stylish design.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. Royal Thai Navy FC

Navy may be T1’s most nondescript club – the recent match-fixing scandal is the only interesting thing to happen to them since I started following Thai football four years ago – but there’s nothing nondescript about their 2018 kit; it’s a cracker. Again I’m biased as they’ve gone for the classic St Etienne green-black-white trio, but it’s a very smart, clean shirt with just the two fairly inobtrusive sponsor logos. Hello sailors!

 

 

 

 

4. Suphanburi FC

Like Navy, Suphanburi are a club who probably bore even their own fans, but their 2018 kit is everything a shirt should be – smart, simple and respecting the traditions of the club. Warrix have come up with some excellent designs this season and this is the best of the lot.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. Nakhon Ratchasima FC

Another winner from Warrix, The Swatcats look sleek & feline in this slinky orange number, with sponsor logos following the brand rather than ruining it. Only let down by some unnecessary background patterns, which are a pet hate of mine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

6. Bangkok Utd

The Angels look rather divine in this smart all-red number. Although it’s somewhat overloaded with sponsor logos, it’s still one of T1’s most stylish kits, though the figure-hugging cut makes it a no-go area for most farang football fans. The black away shirt gives me serious kit envy, though the white away shirt with blue flecks looks like a urinal cake.

 

 

 

 

7. Prachuap FC

This season’s surprise package – 4th in the table as I write – also place highly in the kit rankings thanks to this bold design from Warrix. Would be higher were it not for the background pattern and the incongruous sponsor logo, but still a damn fine effort.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

8. Pattaya Utd

You can generally rely on the Dolphins to be well turned out and 2018 is no exception with this simple, straightforward Ari number. The rather silly cracked glass effect lets it down a bit, but that sky blue camouflage away shirt is an absolute belter – perfect for clandestine missions down Walking Street.

 

 

 

 

 

9. Buriram Utd

You know what you’re getting with a Buriram shirt – dark blue, big Chang logo in the middle, no fannying about. This year’s version is as classic – and as boring – as ever, though the collar makes it look more like a polo shirt and, again, there’s a rather pointless background effect going on. Full marks however for their round-necked AFC Champions League shirt which I would happily wear if it didn’t have a Buriram badge on it.

 

 

 

10. Port FC

By Port’s fairly lamentable standards, 2018’s shirt isn’t that bad. There’s only so much you can do with orange & blue stripes yet the design team at Grand Sport do insist on fannying about as much as they possibly can. The more orangey right-hand side is much better than the mess on the left, so why they didn’t make the whole shirt look like that is a mystery. But more than any other T1 shirt, it is ruined by sponsor logos, in particular that horrible big blue square on the front which completely obscures the shirt design; the bizarre black V in the collar; and the Air Asia logo that looks like it was thrown on at the last minute by a blind darts player.

 

 

 

 

 

 

11. Chonburi FC

An otherwise simple Nike template design, with all-white sponsor logos (can the FAT make this compulsory please?), let down by two things: some rather pointless, wishy-washy stripes, and the fact that Chonburi are charging 2200BHT a pop for them – more than they charge for a season ticket. That said, owning a new shirt is probably a more pleasurable experience than watching 17 Chonburi games, so maybe it isn’t such bad value after all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

12. Chainat FC

Cheating Chainat’s 2018 shirt, hard to track down online, seems to be based on the same Warrix template as Prachuap’s, but is ranked much lower for three good reasons – it’s pink, it’s Chainat, and they’ve almost copied Port’s “We Are the Legend” slogan from 2016, in an even more grammatically incorrect fashion.

 

 

 

 

 

 

13. Air Force Utd

Air Force have had some very nice kits in the past (2016’s Uruguayesque shirt being a particular favourite) but the 2018 effort – modelled here by Port legend Ekkapoom – isn’t one of them. Again it’s befouled by obtrusive sponsor logos, looks more like a polo shirt, and has a two-tone fade look that makes it appear as if it has been sent to a cheap backpacker laundry. The Poom deserves a lot better.

 

 

 

 

 

14. Muangthong Utd

Who’s this in the relegation zone? Why, it’s our old friends Muangthong. For their 2018 effort, Grand Sport have done a commendably half-arsed job, taking the template for Port’s 2017 strip (grandad collar included) and simply changing the colours. Which is about as much effort as such a foul garment deserves. I’d wander around Bangkok in a Make America Great baseball cap before I wore one of these.

 

 

 

 

15. Sukhothai FC

We’re really getting down to the dregs now and Sukhothai’s 2018 shirt is a shocker. Whether it’s the faded orange colour, the dated collar or the tacky flames at the bottom of the shirt, it’s a disaster all round, only slightly mitigated by tasteful application of sponsor logos. With 3 going down it’d be just about enough to keep them up, but sorry boys, it’s 5 this year so bye-bye.

 

 

 

 

16. Ubon UMT Utd

No surprise to see Ubon in the bottom 3, in either fashion or footballing terms. Last season’s kit was one of the worst in T1, and this year they’ve pulled it off again with what looks like the kind of shirt Albania’s 239th-ranked tennis player might wear. The gold stripes look like the shirt has been driven over by a car (a tempting proposition given their performance at Port last week), and bizarrely they appear to be sponsoring themselves. Surely there must be rules about that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

17. Ratchaburi Mitr Phol FC

Screaming “Ansells Bitter Sunday League 1987”, this monstrosity looks like it was designed using MS Paint. By someone who really hates Ratchaburi. Everything about it is horrible, from the sponsor logos on the shoulders to the huge, dated-looking Mitr Phol logo on the front. No wonder all their coaches quit after a couple of weeks. An effort which would normally condemn them to the wooden spoon, however…

 

 

 

 

 

18. Police Tero FC

Anyone wondering why FBT don’t seem to get many T1 shirt contracts these days need wonder no longer. This is truly horrific, and looks like they ran out of money and had to stitch together a shirt made up of half a dozen different old kits. Possibly the one shirt in this list which would benefit from having 27 sponsor logos slapped on top of it to hide the designer’s work, assuming there was a designer involved, which is unlikely. Police haven’t been made to look this bad since the Rodney King video.