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(The Day After) Boxing Day Massacre – Samut Prakan Dons 6 -3 Port

 

There is a tendency when teams at the top of the table lose to less fancied opposition for the reporting to focus on the failures of the title chasers and ignore the efforts of the victor. Well, strap in because this report won’t be breaking with tradition. This was a defeat purely of Port’s own making.

Having gone over two months without conceding a league goal from open play, yesterday was the day that everything went wrong. As 5 goals were gifted from open play alongside one of the most needless penalties seen in a long time. A total implosion, the kind of thing that could easily be summed up with a one word match report, it’s just hard to know which expletive to use. All that tactical awareness, planning, shape, maturity stuff you’ve been hearing about under Oud, simply disappeared. This was very much a worst of Port performance. There were spells where a pass was as likely appear intended for an opponent as a player in yellow.

 

Bonilla sums up the prevailing mood

 

There was a sense of déjà vu to the game as Port:

“….concede 2 goals in the first 10 minutes…… and generally play without any cohesive game plan. The absence of Dolah from the back four spoke volumes…….”

The quote is taken from the report of our trip to Samut Prakan last season. The difference was this was much worse. Firstly we got ourselves two down quicker, as 4 minutes in Jaroensak (11) collected the ball out wide, he’d already beaten Kevin (23) once and this time the fullback couldn’t get close enough to impede his cross which was swung over to the far post where all 5ft 9 ½ inches of Teeraphol (19) was able to head home. Tanaboon (71) is neither in the right area to clear or picking up the player. Its not a great header and Worawut (36) should really do better than to just palm it into the side netting.  The second, 2 minutes later is scored by Jaroensak, as he finds himself with acres of space on the edge of the box and unleashes a thunder bolt shot into the top corner. Its one of those goals, you can argue Kevin should have given him less space and that more often than not they go into orbit but when they come off it’s a goal of the season contender.

So with a two goal cushion the tone of the game was established, the Dons could sit back and hit on the break. Jaroensak was giving Kevin a torrid time. Port would have more of the ball (60% possession) but often appeared toothless, while the dangerous opportunity count would be somewhat more heavily stacked in favour of the hosts. Yet, after 20 minutes a lifeline was offered as Pakorn (7), stretching for his own miss control, challenges Suphanan (4) and the ball hits the defenders arm. As with Worawut (24) vs. Ratchaburi, it really would be better if this wasn’t a penalty but the (current bad) rule is clear and there really shouldn’t be the prolonged VAR review. Here, the narrative deviates from last season as Suarez (5), just shy of 4 minutes after the incident occurs puts the penalty away to give Port hope, if they can start playing to their ability they might get back into the game.

 

That face you pull when your new team concede 6.

 

A theory sadly dispelled by the defence who, if they started the game looking hungover, spent the latter part of the half looking like they’d used the VAR review to down shots of sherry. That’s one way to make the game interesting. Not to be outdone, Siwakorn (16 units and counting) then gives away a penalty as Yuto (23) collected Tanaboon’s clearance (or more a pass to the opposition) and the deity of the sandpit, takes what appears to be a drunkard tumble into the back of the Japanese player just inside the box. After a 2 minute VAR review, the only reasons l can guess that it took more than 15 seconds were A) the VAR team were in on the drinking game or B) like everyone else they needed a few looks to try and figure out what Siwakorn thought he was attempting (I still don’t have a clue and I’m into double digit views). 3-1. Things weren’t so bad at the other end as Bonilla (99) headed an opportunity a little too well into the ground and it sailed over the bar. Then midway through the 2 minutes stoppage time, because with over 6 minutes of time lost to VAR alone, 2 minutes is the logical amount of time to add on, Pakorn sends a good cross in for Adisak (9) to head home. 3-2. Hope springs eternal and all that, if Oud just bashes some heads and breaks out the black coffee maybe we can still nick something from this car crash.

Except things really don’t get any better in the second half. After 55 minutes there’s more shambolic defending before the ball is laid off for Suphanan, who’s tame shot l’d back myself to save, even after a few bottles of Baileys, Worawut somehow manages to dive over the ball and it rolls into the bottom corner to re-establish the two goal cushion. Which last 15 minutes, in which time Adisak manages to fluff a one on one before Patiwat (1) and Aris (27) decide to join in with the gift giving or maybe just found Ports sherry stash from the first half and present Bonilla the ball a couple of yards out, who can’t fail to score.

So 4-3, time for a famous come back that will be spoken about for years and glosses over the substandard performance. Not a chance, Port have Boli (94) (who must wonder what he’s signed up to) and Tanasith (11) on for Pakorn and Siwakorn and go all gung ho. A little too gung ho, as the move the sums the game up leads to a Dons fifth, Tanaboon stands on the ball before playing it to Bonilla who’s back heel isn’t within 10ft of a Port player. A couple of quick passes reveal that Port have pushed everyone at least 15 yards into the attacking half and Jaroensak, finding himself well clear of the defence, flies into the Port area before squaring the ball to Tardeli (37) who scores. Aris then adds the sixth with a textbook headed corner, you’d hope Santa or another Nordic type might have stopped him had they been on the field, but neither were.

Thankfully it was over. 6-3, and frankly enough to drive you to drink.

Any lingering hopes of a title challenge are all but gone, with Port now 10 points behind BG with a game in hand: away to Chiangrai on the 5th January (assuming all their players remember their kit, don’t have doctors notes about ingrowing toenails etc). Even with a win its hard to imagine a 7 point gap being made up.

 

Man of the Match

Adisak. A tough choice, given how bad it was. However the goal machine gets it, not because he scored but for one moment, after 67 minutes Samut Prakan were again breaking through the lines and there was one player determinedly tracking the ball carrier deep into our half before putting a big challenge. I expected to see Go’s number 8 shirt when the tackler rose but instead it was Adisak. When all was going to the dogs around him, 4-2 down, the striker was still there giving 100%. On a grim evening, it was about as good as it got for Port.

 

Goalscorer, tackler, trier.